I'm back in Mexico City for a few days, and am rapidly approaching the end of my trip. I feel good and bad about that. I do feel like it's time for me to get on the path I've chosen for myself. I feel like a constant outsider here, especially in DF. I got in a fight with a potato chip vendor the other day because he insisted on calling one of his friends who spoke English with me rather than let me order in Spanish. I very rarely get angry about anything, but that did it. I am not the most gifted navigator in the world, and have wasted at least 2 hours of my life being lost in the Zocalo of DF, over several different visits. The talk about how dangerous Mexico is right now is starting to scare me a little, especially here in DF. I feel perfectly comfortable walking around Guanajuato by myself, but as soon as the sun goes down here in DF, I had better be within a block or 2 of my house, or I've got one hand on my pepper spray. I am tired of how difficult it is to do things. I have gotten pretty good at reading the trash man's mind and anticipating his arrival, but it's just not the same as having a schedule. The weather is also starting to get on my nerves. It's HOT in the day. It's FREEZING at night. In DF, my throat hurts all the damn time because of the smog. For now, that's all the complaints I can think of.
On the positive side:
The people here are (generally) very sweet. I love people watching here. I love the uniforms the students wear. I love the white coats the pharmacy students at UNAM wear. I love feeling like I know where I'm going in the metro. I love Guanajuato. I love seeing friendly and familiar faces while walking down the street there. I love Spanish. I love the market that springs to life every Tuesday on our street. I love comida corrida and puestos and blue corn tortillas. I love nopales. I love chilaquiles. I love spending all afternoon sitting on a bench talking with a friend. I love agua de jamaica. I love jicama! I REALLY LOVE JICAMA!! I love that when I want jicama, I can find someone selling it on the street within 10 minutes wherever I am. I love watching movies in Spanish and understanding them. I love making people laugh in Spanish.
As much as I love Mexico, it's not my home. I miss being near my family. I really miss driving. I miss working (a little bit). When I get back, I'll work part time somehow, doing something involving Spanish, and I'll apply to grad school. Hopefully I'll start grad school in January. I am really excited to come back. It's been great to be here for a little while, but it's time to go home.